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Dear Mark
One day not too long ago I was sitting in my living room and thinking of some of the events of my life and I happened to think of some of the items that I collected during that time. One item stands out front like a beacon. It was a rare and priceless coconut head which has many curing and magnetic qualities. And realizing that I am in the sunset of my life, I thought who is going to inherit this valuable treasure?
I went through many a sleepless night pondering over this mighty issue. I started with your mother, dad, and Kip - and I went down the list until I came to you Mark. I figured you being the oldest Grandson, you should inherit this one in a million rare coconut which hung in a choice part of my home for several decades.
I thought what a terrific birthday gift - so I decided that you will have to guard and cherish it until you pass it on to one of your heirs. I can't really express in words the pleasure this lovely nut has given me and I personally believe that this nut will give you the same.
The secret of how I came to own this unusual nut is a long story. It is a story of love, intrigue, sacrifice, struggle, and intolerable torture with a lot of angry natives and an underground temple. I will carry the secret to my grave and long live the indestructible and amazing coconut.
Now it is up to you Mark to carry on. "Happy Birthday"
Love - Grand pap Dom